Did you hear the one about the film funding agency that tried to start a comedy factory?

Telefilm Canada, the Canadian Film Centre and Just For Laughs have announced the creation of ‘Canada’s first advanced training program to develop theatrical feature-length comedies.’ Introduced July 23 at the Just For Laughs Comedy Conference in Montreal, the Telefilm Canada Features Comedy Lab launches in November with ‘the goal of developing five successful original feature comedies for Canadian and international audiences.’

It’s the first announcement from the recently appointed Sheila de La Varende, Telefilm’s director of national and international business development – although the initiative began under predecessor Danny Chalifour. She said, ‘While Canada has made some great comedies, such as Strange Brew, Porky’s and Bon Cop, Bad Cop, for a country that is recognized globally for its sense of humor, we have not fully exploited our potential to make funny and commercially successful feature films.’

CFC executive director Slawko Klymkiw upped the hyperbole: ‘We are the world’s favorite cultural import.’

Then JFL COO Bruce Hills chimed in: ‘Being in the business of making people laugh, we know how intimately comedy and movies are intertwined.’ He followed this non sequitur with references to Jim Carrey, Robin Williams, Woody Allen, Mike Meyers, Will Ferrell and Judd Apatow, the very utterance of the names like a sprinkling of comic fairy dust on the putative projects.

I could not ignore the red light on my BS detector.

First, the Telefilm name goes on the program but the agency’s vaunted expertise is not mentioned. Where is Stephanie Azam, our ‘film czarina’? It seemed to me Telefilm may as well be saying, ‘After all, what does our staff know about making successful movies?’

Second, Canada’s global reputation for comedy is a fallacy of our own creation. The only persons in the world who care if a comic is from Canada are Canadians.

The whole thing rekindled memories of former Telefilm head Richard Stursberg and his twilight move to ally Telefilm with the talent agency CAA, as though the imprimatur of a Hollywood brand – or, in this case, Just For Laughs – were some quality assurance that could be stamped on the movie poster, like VQA on Canadian wine.

So I called Telefilm. Both Sheila de La Varende and Stephanie Azam on the line together. They played me like a violin.

‘As you know, Denis, Telefilm has been working closely with the feature film working groups. Through those consultations we identified gaps in genre diversity… We need improved scripts and genre diversification to expand the portfolio, and make for stronger marketplace-driven projects…’

‘Particularly comedies,’ added Azam.

‘Particularly comedies,’ agreed de La Varende. ‘Because they are stronger in the market, comedies being a bigger audience-generator.’

‘Just because a project gets picked for the comedy lab doesn’t mean we will finance it,’ said Azam.

When I was finished with them (or they were finished with me), my detector had switched off.

I called the CFC and put it bluntly: What does the CFC know about big-time comedy? Kathryn Emslie, director of film and TV programs, was as disarming as usual. It seems her boss Klymkiw has been pals with Just For Laughs since his days at the CBC. He had been waiting for an opportunity to tap into the JFL resource.

She pointed out that the CFC has been moving beyond training acolytes and into professional development with established filmmakers for some time. The alumni base has matured.

‘This program is really about making a difference. What opportunities can we create for our talent base here in Canada? How do we help them build a comedy project that is going to get an audience? We looked at the [Telefilm] criteria, what the gap was that Telefilm identified, and we came back with an approach.’

But, I sputtered, isn’t JFL just in this for the money? I had visions of Alan Thicke being Gulfstreamed in for hot-tub consultations at Hazelton Hotel. It seems not. Telefilm is kicking in $248,000 per year for five years, the CFC $32,000 and JFL $30,000 in cash and kind.

‘What’s amazing about the CFC is that we are extremely cost-effective,’ said Emslie. ‘We have never paid the going rate to our professional mentors. We could never sustain that. They’ve got to be generous, they’ve got to want to give back…’

When I pointed out that the release references two ancient and mediocre comedies, she defended Porky’s vigorously. ‘Like it or not, it’s part of our film history. It’s a cultural reference point.’ And she reminded me that there is a range of comedy out there from the sublime Alexander Payne to the ridiculous Farrelly Brothers.

Telefilm is doing the right thing: instead of trying to be all things to all people, it is delegating, outsourcing to organizations better placed to provide insight and expertise. Telefilm is listening to the industry.

So the joke’s on me.